Learning to Love Yourself All the Time

#RealTalk: loving yourself all the time is hard.

I’ve struggled with my body image for over ten years. I remember being in the sixth grade and knowing I was the “fat kid” because I hit 100 pounds before any of my friends. I remember being a freshman in high school and knowing I couldn’t be a flyer on the cheer team because I was a “whopping” 115 pounds. I remember twenty minutes ago when I was trying on clothes for a shoot and wishing my waist and chest was smaller.

Circa 2013 right before I graduated high school. Probably my best shape and strongest but still thinking I was a whale. (Also peep that iPhone.)

And, when you’ve thought like this for this long it’s really hard to break the cycle and think positive all the time. I have days now where I feel fly as hell and walk around with my head held high (freshman in high school me never thought she’d see the day) and then I have days like today where I notice every imperfection. Recently, the latter has been true more often than not. It sucks.

Loving yourself is hard. Seeing your body and not comparing it to others is hard. And, not putting a significant amount of value in said body and appearance is even harder. We live in an image based culture and when what we see doesn’t match what we imagine things can get bad really fast.

With the new moon this past Sunday, I’m setting intentions for myself to change my perspective and see my body as something more than a number on a scale. I’m putting forth more energy into loving myself all the time.

Say it with me sisters:

My body is strong. My body is perfectly imperfect. My body is capable. My body is mine.

Now that you have this mantra in your head, you can take the next steps to beginning your journey of endless self-love.

Change Your Perspective of Yourself

This is where you start. My fiancé keeps telling me that I can’t change a situation if I don’t change the lens I’m looking at it with. Whether its rose-colored glasses or you’re seeing things in black and white, take a step back.

Start with your self talk.

Instead of looking at yourself and seeing thighs that rub together think my legs are strong and carry me everyday.

Instead of being upset when something in your closet doesn’t fit think I have outgrown these clothes but it’s because I’m forever growing as a person. My body is changing and so am I.

Instead of pointing out every flaw choose to point out your assets. And, I mean ALL of them.

Practice Self Care

Self care looks different for everyone but it’s important on this journey of self-love to develop a routine. First, focus on your physical health. Make sure you’re getting enough sleep, drinking enough water and nourishing your body sufficiently. Once you have that under your belt, focus on your body’s movement. Get active and feel how strong your body really is. Go for an evening walk or start your day with a gentle yoga flow.

Next, focus on your mental health. Turn inward and get very reflective. Meditate on your day and set intentions. Journal. Talk to a friend or even seek out a therapist. Think and talk about what’s going on internally and don’t let any emotion be too much. Have a good cry and let it all out.

Then, indulge. Do the things that help you to relax and feel good. Take a bubble bath, spend the day at the pool, have a little me time with your vibrator or curl up with your favorite book for a few hours. Whatever you do make sure it’s solely for you.

Change Your Perspective of The World

Changing how you look at the world and yourself is a big part of this journey to loving yourself all the time. I think once you’re able to identify what makes you great and strong then looking at the world around us can be a little easier.

Instead of looking at a fitness Instagram account and feeling down on yourself because you don’t look the same, change your perspective. Acknowledge that they are strong and in shape but also acknowledge how your body is strong in a different way. Equally strong but equally different.

Instead of online shopping and being frustrated because you think none of the clothes will look as good on you as the models, change your perspective. Focus on what looks good on your body and dress your body for you.

Speak It Into The Universe

Practice your mantra. Think it. Whisper it. Speak it. And, when you’re ready, yell it. Now I’m going to get a little woo-woo on you but let the universe know that your perspective is changing and that you are accepting of this change. Scream it to the heavens or discuss it with a close friend.

Whatever it is, let it be known.

Loving yourself all the time is really hard but it’s possible. I challenge you, sisters, to start on this journey with me. Change your perspective, focus on yourself and let it be known that you are open to this change. Learn that loving yourself isn’t selfish or bad. It’s necessary to being the best version of yourself.

Now, I’m going to end with my mantra for this moon cycle.

My body is strong. My body is perfectly imperfect. My body is capable. My body is mine.

What is yours?

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